it's singular.
and it's the 18th of April.
and that's next Saturday.
and it's pretty much a big deal.
and i'm kinda sorta trying not to freak out.
the end!
-me

- the beginning of this semester is grand
- classes will be hard...mostly Medical Physiology
- I get to have 7 hours of Med Phys lecture a week! haha
- at least it is really interesting :]
- Jesus has really been visible lately
- I know He's always there. and He's always great.
- I think I'm just learning to see and listen.
- I guess you could say I am seeking...and finding...
- friends are lovely. I've got some true ones, too. :]
- I have really been missing my family a lot lately.
- I am in Kokomo for the weekend (as I am most weekends)
- but it's only us three girls here right now.
- Kiwi's puppies are ADORABLE: Cupid, Donner, Blitzen, and Dancer :]
- 24 has been fun to watch!
- Anita is going to make chinese food tonight...including sushi. i'm excited.
- anyway, this was just a few key points...mainly I have been enjoying Jesus and His Kingdom. It truly is the most wonderful thing/aspect of life ever. don't ever stop searching for more, people. don't ever become comfortable in where you are in wisdom, love, hope, and faith. enjoy Jesus, my friends. no matter what happens.

In My Hand

written: 5-11-08

Here it sets

In my hand.

See it shine?

Oh, I’m so glad it’s mine.

I softly touch it,

But when I do

He says I must

Throw it in the fire too.

Oh, God, anything but this!

What if something should happen?

What if? What if?

I couldn’t’ have it melt!

And that fire is awfully hot.

No, why don’t I just keep it

In this nice, safe spot.

 

“but is it pure?” He asks

“is it Perfect and Strong?”

Well…sure it is!

Because, see, how pretty

And shiny and wonderful?

There is no flaw noticeable

So it must be perfect

Without the fire, right?

Because I can’t throw it in.

If it melted, I’d die.

Because this thing in my hand

Is really special…and I…

I just can’t risk it

Being gone forever.

 

“It must be tested.” He states.

“A fake is no fun.

And if it’s not real it cannot

Be wanted in this spot.”

 

So, I see His point

And think it through..

If it has no value

Why should I adore it, like I do?

So I wanted it tested

Because I wanted to see

If it’s pure; and if

It’s worthy of attention from me.

I threw it in the fire

After one last glance

He softly smiled at me

And we both truly hope

The heat it withstands.

Because if it is pure

It will return to its place

In my hand.

It is now 2009. And as I read through my journal from last year, I run across this poem above. It is seven months later, and God has answered that prayer. And it did not withstand the fire....but was consumed.

The following verses were some God used last year to speak to me.....and I understand now.

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" It is not God!
      Therefore, it must be smashed to bits." Hosea 8:6b

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   “Look around at the nations;
      look and be amazed!
   For I am doing something in your own day,
      something you wouldn’t believe
      even if someone told you about it." Habakkuk 1:5

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“My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the Lord.
      “And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine.
For just as the heavens are higher than the earth,
      so my ways are higher than your ways
      and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.

“The rain and snow come down from the heavens
      and stay on the ground to water the earth.
   They cause the grain to grow,
      producing seed for the farmer
      and bread for the hungry.
It is the same with my word.
      I send it out, and it always produces fruit.
   It will accomplish all I want it to,
      and it will prosper everywhere I send it.
You will live in joy and peace.
      The mountains and hills will burst into song,
      and the trees of the field will clap their hands!
Where once there were thorns, cypress trees will grow.
      Where nettles grew, myrtles will sprout up.
   These events will bring great honor to the Lord’s name;
      they will be an everlasting sign of his power and love.” Isaiah 55:8-13

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"For I hold you by your right hand—
      I, the Lord your God.
   And I say to you,
      ‘Don’t be afraid. I am here to help you." Isaiah 41:13

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 "Keep me safe, O God,
      for I have come to you for refuge.

I said to the Lord, “You are my Master!
      Every good thing I have comes from you.”
The godly people in the land
      are my true heroes!
      I take pleasure in them!
 Troubles multiply for those who chase after other gods.
      I will not take part in their sacrifices of blood
      or even speak the names of their gods.

 Lord, you alone are my inheritance, my cup of blessing.
      You guard all that is mine.
 The land you have given me is a pleasant land.
      What a wonderful inheritance!

 I will bless the Lord who guides me;
      even at night my heart instructs me.
 I know the Lord is always with me.
      I will not be shaken, for he is right beside me.

 No wonder my heart is glad, and I rejoice.
      My body rests in safety.
 For you will not leave my soul among the dead
      or allow your holy one to rot in the grave.
 You will show me the way of life,
      granting me the joy of your presence
      and the pleasures of living with you forever." Ps 16

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and for 2009? The verse of the year is Ps 57:8-11